Browsing About Nat

Relationships, Relation Ships

December6

Anything worth having in life requires dedicating time to it. When you are single and off on your own, you only worry about yourself,your shelter, your food supply, your sustainability in the world. Life is easy for one.  Then one day  you stumble upon and meet a human that reflects a lot of your fundamental beliefs/values, a friendship and romantic chemistry that is all encompassed, it’s magic, it’s rare, its kismet!  You make the decision to progress forward with this magical connection, testing it out, making sure its real and not fleeting. Through  time, some individuals escalate the testing to live in the same space and incorporate both lives together, the sustainability now becomes 2 instead of one. So living in the same space brings a slew of  testing elements, each individual brings their way of being, thinking, to the romantic relationship. Within a loving, romantic relationship there has to be a wonderful friendship, and then an awesome individual relationship with our self. Keeping yourself intact is your job, people, places things just enhance your world experience.

Our way of being begins from nurture and nature, our genetics map us (our parents, grandparents, maybe great grandparents, maybe skipping generations) so does your upbringing, in and out of the home  we are raised for those 18 years. Not everyone gets that amount of time, it varies on ones circumstances, their life. Not everyone has or gets siblings, or both parents, or even parents. So as infants we are taught and hopefully guided to perfect our motor skills  , and protect our tender brain spot to help us develop into the adults that we become.  Our personalities develop by 6 and then parents add or subtract from our learning curve, and then we start to add or subtract stuff along our independence journey.

For my first 20 years of life I lived under my parents roof, and they tried to teach me the lessons of life, being responsible, independent, tools to defend myself through my way in the world.  So I had 20 years of juggling advise and observing a couple demonstrate their love, to each other and how they presented their love and their genders to myself and my siblings.  So there are all these relationships going on with each other as well as how my female and male role-model  parents interact with each other, us,individually, and together as a family.  There is a lot going on within the family you are raised in, and there are things that are instilled in you, and when children are finding, and discovering  themselves, parents play a very influential part in the process.

These are stages and dots that I have been connecting and continue to connect in my life.  Introspection and analyzing everything, choices, emotions,people,places and things in my life.

I have data that I collected being raised in my family home, then when I moved away into my own home, being single, I put all my tools, nurture, nature things to test. I had old and new data to analyze, what I was taught as a child and then what I learned being on my own, making all my decisions based on guidance and tools taught to me by my parents. The example they displayed of their loving relationship between a man and woman, their individual gender roles of how a woman and man behave, ( whatever genders a child is raised with) the responsibility that they demonstrated with finances, jobs/work ethic, hygiene, in their choices of behavior towards each other and us. I took all that data and then with  my experiences incorporated all of it into my way of being and thinking. One thing that I found is that children tend to repeat what they learned from their experience in their families.  You observe 18 years of a relationship being played out before your eyes and ears.  Think about how TV influences the masses, so parents definitely leave a mark on their children. That is why you always hear break the cycle whether it is our own world history or our own personal family history that we want to improve.  As Humans we are not perfect, our genetic make up, genes passed down from generations,nature/nurture, effects us all in different ways. So take everything you are exposed to, analyze it and try to improve yourself, what ever predisposed and new data you are dealing with.

Returning After Some Downtime

September9

My Last blog post was on March 31st regarding the discrimination that still goes on against women.  We need to fight for, support, and have each others back .  I have seen a little shift where women are becoming more fearless.  Our younger generations see things less traditional, and are way more exposed to the world, not just their home town, state, or country.  Look at Malala , a courageous youth who is fighting for the right for female education ! There is still a lot of unwarranted discrimination regarding race, sexuality, religion, national origin, age, disability, around the world, however, I’m pretty sure women have been targeted the longest through the centuries. Still, no group should be discriminated against period !

I have to admit that I am a hypocrite at times.  I have been struggling with balancing work, family, fun, relationships,  etc… It has been all work and no play. I have been existing not living for a long period and that is no way to be, or live.  I have issues and I hope I will conquer them all. I am at a crossroads in my life. I take ownership that I have not been happy for a while. I need change, want change, and only I can do it ! Aging is not an issue for me, it is a reality, it creeps up slowly, my fountain of youth is entering into another phase, stage in life with things like perimenopause,  difficulty reading small print, unaccounted for aches and pains, etc….  I am so blessed I still have my family and a great couple of friends in my life to help me navigate through this maze of life.

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Jacksonville On My Mind And On Google Maps !

February14

I get to share with my family here and abroad the actual locations, places I lived or went to in Jacksonville, Florida. Riverside was one of my favorite areas of Jacksonville. I lived in several places throughout Riverside. I lived off of Hendricks St.  I use to walk the streets in the neighborhood and would frequent St Johns Ave.  I ate at Biscottis regularly.   At one point I resided off Riviera Parkway  apartments on  the water on  the right hand side. I would eat lunch at the Jacksonville Landing when I worked at the  State Employees Credit Union (used to be Government Employees Credit Union).  I also lived off Riverside Ave.  I lived in Jacksonville from 1990 to 2001.  I met some amazing people and friends there.  It is a place that holds fond memories in my heart.

Today is Valentines Day and I have a lot of love, not only for my honey bunny, for my family and friends who have demonstrated and been an extension of love.

Very Emotional Morning

February13

I just started balling. I think I may have found a friend of mine that I have thought of over the years. I have reconnected with a couple of good friends recently, however this one in particular broke a little piece of my heart. I lost contact many years ago.  I do not know what the outcome will be, I will try my best and pray for the best.  It has been so long that I wonder if she has changed,  I do not think so, not her foundation.  Of course with years that go by, new experiences, new additions, subtractions, what we choose to keep or extract from our lives modifies us. Things that were important before, become less important, vice versa.  She will always have a special place in my heart, she made an imprint and I will always be grateful.

When you lose touch with friends and you reconnect it is nice to feel that even though there was a loss of time, connection, involvement, missing out on each others journey through life, that the bond, the love is still there.  I do not have that many friends however the ones I do have are the best, I treasure them.

My Sicily Italy

February10

31 viale della Regione Nicolsi is where I lived ! I loved this house, It was a nice town about 35 minutes from the Naval base. I just pulled it up minutes ago on Google maps/satellite. When I navigate up the street on the left side I get a shot of the side rails and balcony ! It is so neat ! It made me cry seeing my Spain and my old house in Sicily. I remember skating around it downstairs. We lived on the upper level.  It had a huge balcony that rapped around half way. Our neighbors right to the left of us Franco and his family, were like family to us. I had a lot of fun times and I spent a lot of time with my sister.   I hope my sister and brother will show their children our childhood homes in Europe. (oh my gosh my brother was a new born baby, he will get a kick out of it) I feel blessed to have had such a wonderful experience.  I was between the ages of 7-9   years old.  I will have to confirm that with my mom, however I’m pretty sure.

 

My Family In Rota Spain, My Memories

February8

If you have ever been to Bodegas El Gato in Rota,Spain then you have been to my uncles place . A bodega is a winery/store/warehouse.  Boy do I have beautiful memories of  the times that I spent with my moms sister and her family. It was a house full of women, my 4 girl cousins, my uncle and aunt. My aunt Juana is no longer with us however I have so many memories of her nurturing ways, she was an amazing healthy cook). My cousin Chari and I were the same age and we spent a lot of time together.  I remember her and I  going down to the bodega to bring back coca cola for lunch or sometimes ice cream for our desert. My last visit to Spain was in 2006 and then in 2011 and what a change to his establishment.  Well there were big changes to Rota since it had been over 16 Years later that I had stepped foot back on its soil.   Two of my cousins, my uncles daughters, have learned the business and work with my uncle.  My other two cousins, One is in London working in the Oxford University, and the other works at Hotel Playa De La Luz.  Here is Rota , Spain through the eyes of Google earth.

If you have ever been to Pizzeria Burger Ton you have been to my cousins restaurant.  I am so proud of my cousins, My Aunt Natalia (an amazing cook and mother) who I am named after, has 4 children and they are some of the most sweetest, and smart people you will ever meet. My cousin Manolo  owned this restaurant  when I was still living in Spain, my dad being in the Navy was stationed in Rota. My cousin Natalia and Agustin are singers. They sing locally in Rota and have gone to do other gigs in near by towns. My cousin Angeles  was a teacher, she has 2 children that she is devoted to.

Google maps view of Pizzeria  Burger Ton.  It is embarrassing however I never thought to look at Rota, Spain on Google earth until today.  I forget what a powerful tool we have and that I can reminisce and look at all the places I went,  the laughter, my high school classmates and our amazing times and experiences overseas.and my heart, my bloodline of family that  I miss. Here is my parents home in Rota,( Google maps/satellite) it is were I lived growing up, and stayed when I visited.

Hola a todos, os quiero mucho, y pienso siempre en ustedes.

I Am An American Spaniard

February1

I posted back in December 17 th,2009 in my about Nat category,  and written periodically about my family, that I was born in Rota, Spain and my mother is a native as well.  It is her home, where her family that we miss dearly resides.  I found a military video of footage of Rota and the Naval Base. There is another video in Spanish, by a television show Comando Actualidad,  that in this segment goes  through Rota, Alicante, Barcelona , Malaga  and Palma De Mallorca Spain. It basically talks about other cultural influences, large population of the foreign inhabitants in the 5 cities of Spain.  In Rota it is the Americans, in Alicante is the Norwegians,  in Barcelona are the Pakistanis, in Malaga the Finnish,  in Palma De Mallorca the Germans.

I have been very fortunate to be born by an American father and Spanish mother, this combination and exposure has enhanced my life. Through the videos, I hope to share pieces of the beautiful country.

Improvements To Things That Already Exist

January25

I have to take a real hard look at making changes in my life.  When your body and mind are depleted you have exhausted all the good stuff, the cohesive well oiled machine that your mind and body once were.  You are aware that changes need to be made however you keep plugging along until your body breaks down.  It got real and serious when I no longer was controlling an outcome. Stress gives you health issues, your diet gives you health issues, overworked, not balancing your fun and work load give you health issues, finances give you health issues, worrying gives you health issues, love gives you health issues.  They can become health issues if you do nothing and let them take over. When we do not try to resolve, minimize, or eliminate the issues, our body and mind become a health consequence.  Do not ignore the warning signs, some are life threatening.  Sometimes the mind wears down before the body or vise versa.

We will always be faced with how we handle or choose to react to problems, stresses, circumstances in our lives. Just do not put it off, figure it out !  Always remember the good too, laugh,  Life is responsibility and fun ! As I get older the clearer everything becomes and the less complicated I want things to be.

 

New Year, Improvements Can Be and Should Be Made

January23

I’m back again, my break was a little rocky, I hit a wall physically and mentally towards the middle of September.  I was down for about 2 and a half months.  It was a wake up call, my body was telling me it would no longer continue the way things were.  You have to balance work, play,  and your relationships.  I was all work, no play.  We all need to laugh, relax, do things we enjoy besides our job.  So you guessed it, I am going to incorporate more play into my life.  I have this one journey and I have to make it count.  Time goes by faster than you think so I have to do fun however or whenever I can !

Another Brake During A Break

May26

So in December I stepped away from my laptop again, having a physically demanding job leaves me little time for other projects. I am currently working more hours than my honey bunny , he is pursuing his dream of being a stand up comic and he is amazing.  He has already done several payed gigs within the gulf coast area(Alabama, Louisiana) only  6 months into his journey.  He knows how to deliver a punch line, well many. He dominates the English language, and is very layered in his delivery ( highbrow). He is very intelligent, quick wit, very knowledgeable, and all of that is a plus in the field of comedy.   He is old school style like George Carlin , Bill Hicks, Mitch Hedberg,Dennis Miller.  I met him 12 years ago in a speech class and he was an amazing speaker then ! He can do anything. He has many skills one is a software engineer/ programmer, writer.  Comedy will not be his only legacy.

 

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